School Quotes...

Student: Why do I have two periods of your class and my friend only has one? That's not fair!

Me: I agree! It isn't fair that your friend only gets to spend one period a day with me and you get to spend two periods with me. I guess you are lucky. That's what you meant...right...(sarcastic smirk).

Student: No.

Me: It should have been!

Student 1: I don't understand #2.

Me: We are studying proper nouns and on this page you are writing the names of people you know in the blanks. Names are capitalized because they are proper nouns. The sentence says "________ is the kindest person I know".

Student 1: What does kindest mean?

Me: Nicest.

Student 1: Oh...(student writes Mrs. Rogers in the blank).

Student 2: That's not true! He just wants to be your favorite.

Me: Well it is working! He knows who grades his work. You should try harder!

Me: (Attempting to tell my new non-English and non-Spanish speaker about taking the bus to and from school...I was frustrated and she was confused.)

Student: I saw her yesterday. She got beat up. (Referring to the student I was talking to.)

Me: She couldn't have gotten beat up! I walked her to all her classes yesterday and out to her mom at the end of the day.

Student: She did! She got beat up! I saw her!

Me: Beat up!?!?!

Student: Picked up...by her mom after school! I saw her!

Me: Picked up?

Student: Yes! Her mom picked her up in her car!

Me: (Sigh and head shake...note to self to spend more time teaching pronunciation.)