Lately...

I never would have imagined how much baby stuff we would get in the mail the closer we got to our original due date in mid July.  Believe it or not, it doesn't really upset me that much.  It does make me a little sad but I'm already well aware that our precious baby boy is with Jesus.  I'm doing well overall.  We still have bad days but there are far fewer of them as time passes.  I don't think we will ever have all the answers we wish we had but that is where faith steps in.  I know God has a plan and he will bless us at the right time.  That said, it can be so hard to stop trying to control things ourselves.

 

I've been reading two very good books.  They have been especially comforting lately since I had a series of sleepless nights at the beginning of summer.  Our sunday school class brought over a basket of goodies right after we got home from the hospital which included "Grieving The Child I Never Knew".  It has been a great devotional with spot on information about each stage of this journey.  "I Will Carry You" is very well written and a great read for anyone even if they aren't in the midst of tough times.  Both have helped me really think about what has happened and what I'm worried about in the future.  I've cried a ton while reading them simply because they bring a lot of emotions to the surface that I sometimes had yet to acknowledge.  We are also constantly blessed by our thoughtful and supportive friends both in town and further away.